Friday, March 19, 2010

Sniss, Snart and Piver What?

So I want to share an embarrassing story about myself. Honestly, I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard or witnessed M's unconditional love for me.

I'm sure you have heard the terms "Sniss" (when you sneeze and piss at the same time) and "Shart" (when you go to fart and shit instead). Well over the last months or so, snissing has become an almost daily occurence for me.

Last night M and I watched a childbirth videa on Instant Netflix. It was made in the 70's or 80's and we made fun of most of it. But it did have some valuable information, including a natural birth. When it was over, we were sitting on the couch talking about birthing and how crazy it will be and whatnot. M held his hands up in a circle and said he couldn't imagine something that big coming out of me. Then I made the same hand circle and put it between my legs, commenting that I couldn't imagaine even opening my legs that wide. M pushed my legs back, as if I was in stirrups to test it out. Well, as soon as my legs were back, I farted (pretty much in his face) and started peeing controllably. I started laughing so hard that I couldn't stop the pee from flowing.

Let me tell you - I soaked through my underwear and pants, leaving a HUGE PUDDLE on the couch. M started yelling, "You fissed! You fissed!" I was dying.

When I went to the bathroom to peel off my pee drenched clothes, M cleaned up the pee. It was such a sweet gesture and made me fall in love again. I honestly thought he would leave it for me to clean up (and rightfully so!).

Later in bed we made up all sorts of word combos for unfortunate bodily functions that can happen together:

Sniss - a sneeze piss
Shart - a shit fart
Fiss - a fart piss
Snart - a sneeze fart
Piver - a piss while you deliver
Shiver - a shit while you deliver

Oh the joys of a pregnant body!

3 comments:

mrs.g said...

LOL, don't feel bad, I'm 20 weeks and I had my first pee-incident this week too!

Molly said...

Hilarious! DH isn't humored by my constant need to change underwear. Seriously, it doesn't matter how many kegels I do. I still sniss every day!

Chris and Mary said...

That made me crack up!